X: Fantastic, Regulus! I've tried this experiment so many times, but I've never had such amazing results!
X: You were the perfect fulcrum! I don't know what I would have done without you.
Regulus: Hmph, have I really surprised you, then? Hah, you've not even seen the best from this Captain yet!
Regulus: Check me out!
Regulus strikes the ball with her cue.
The ball rolls forward, coasting along blindly down an over-complicated track.
After an incomprehensible chain of further Goldberg reactions, including a toy fire engine and a bowl of spaghetti, the fuse, at last, ignites.
Sounding off a twenty-one gun salute in the laboratory, which naturally comes accompanied by a positively wicked rock guitar riff courtesy of Regulus.
Regulus: Easy as pie!
X: Splendid, Captain! This exper- … This show of ours is ready to shock the world.
The two like-minded participants are quick to cheer their success.
Unfortunately, one person's honey can be another's vinegar.
And soon, it would not only be fireworks exploding inside the laboratory.
Mesmer Jr.: Just what in the hell have you been doing in here!
Mesmer Jr.: Why is there a toothbrush stuck in the conveyor belt??? A test tube rack hanging in the air??? A banana peel lying on dry ice??? And why, just why, are there rhinoceros horns in the disinfection cabinet???
X: Oh, please don't mind the mess, Mesmer. All in the name of science!
X: Regulus and I are just testing out some "new gadgets" … a rehearsal for a new performance.
Mesmer Jr.: I'm sure I don't need to tell you just how many safety regulations you've violated. Not that you would care ...
Mesmer Jr.: And what exactly is the scientific aim you hope to achieve with this absurd contraption?
Regulus: Obviously, it's for the show—
X: Obviously, it's for mechanical science.
X: You might not be familiar with Rube Goldberg machines. Their constituent components may seem obtuse or unusual, but when combined, they produce results of remarkable precision.
Mesmer Jr.: Oh, indeed, like lighting a firework that you could reach by simply bending down.
X: Well, maybe ... But, it's the process that matters! Otherwise, why wouldn't we just die as soon as we're born?
Mesmer Jr.: I've never seen any viable scientific experiment involve a banana peel on dry ice.
X: Is science not about exploring the unknown?
As the argument begins to spiral up to its peak, Regulus could not help herself from cracking open a bottle of Dr. Papper.
Mesmer Jr.: I've had enough of these childish fancies! Useful mechanics must be concise and repeatable, not these hair-brained schemes you cook up in your imagination!!
X: Haha, that's only your own bias at work, Ms. Mesmer. Simple machines might work like that, but it's totally different with complicated systems.
Mesmer Jr.: With all due respect, these inventions of yours are nothing more than meaningless garbage. I suggest you dismantle this ... thing immediately, and return the laboratory to its original state.
X: My work is hardly useless. It reveals the hidden truths of the universe! Have you considered that life itself was born from a subtle Goldberg machine?
X: In the chaotic primordial soup, chemicals collided randomly, forming, by sheer precise coincidence, the foundations of cellular life.
X: Similarly, in my apparatus, spheres move repeatedly, eventually reaching a stable outcome. It's a transition from chaos to order …
Regulus: Vertin, Vertin! Just in time! I figure they're about to start fighting any second!
Mesmer Jr.: Forget it!!
Mesmer Jr.: I thought the arcanists here would be ... normal! Must the Timekeeper always be surrounded by these …
The atmosphere around Mesmer Jr. at this moment can only be compared to the sky during the Great Fire of London in 1666. Mere seconds away from inferno.
Mesmer Jr.: Never mind. You should know, I will be documenting my observations of this incident in a forthcoming report.
The professionalism of her words comes in sharp contrast with her barely-concealed rage as she storms off.